Jellyfish Training: What If a Jellyfish Could Use Kettlebells?

By Rob Sutter


Jellyfish have no frame. Scientists have shown us that they have no bone structure and that they are a pile of squishy cells. I want to know if a jellyfish, if it were infused with human stem cells, would be able to follow training with kettlebells? I can imagine a hybrid creature improving with bones and human features, being able to do such a workout.

If I was a squishy creature with no bone structure and I established some sort of skeleton, the first thing I would do is a workout regarding these distinctive weights. This form of training is harsh and it takes a good set of bones to do any kind of kettlebell training. This would be an vast feat for a jellyfish, in my mind. Perhaps if we get to a point where science is this robust, such an occurrence may be possible.

Working with kettlebells not only helps to build strength in the cartilage naturally seen in the body but muscles are refined as well. Let's say that a jellyfish wanted to prove its worth when it came to strength overall. This workout method could be perfect, except for the fact that a creature like this has no bone structure to be seen. Even if a jellyfish gains bones, they are rather new and could stand to be broken easily. This may be where fitness authorities the likes of Lorna could come into play.

This way of exercise has been around for a long time but not as long as the mystical jellyfish. The time it would take for a jellyfish to adapt to its new skeleton and begin performing a kettlebell workout, in my opinion, would be almost instantaneous. To say this kind of creature is amazing would be an understatement. It wouldn't be much longer until these weights were utilized in a form of workout that could make it that much stronger.

Jellyfish are almost wholesome muscle. If a jellyfish ever grew a backbone and performed a kettlebell workout, I think they would be a rising sun in the obliteration of the human race. I sure hope that a jellyfish never comes across this kind of workout program. I wouldn't want to be a slave to the new jellyfish charge. I know they would flog me with those electrical tentacles while they are doing these types of training workouts.




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